Soooo…I’m still going to Singles Ministry at church. For the past several months I’ve been wavering on continuing to attend, with the last two or three months being the toughest. Since it’s started I’ve only missed two meetings–one because I had to work, the other because I had a strange inkling doing so would be unsafe since I walk and take public transportation (thank You Holy Spirit for alerting me to whatever danger was lurking!).
First things first: I truly believe I’m supposed to be attending Singles, grudgingly or not. If you know my story of the past three years, the very fact that I’m writing this blog post from my hometown is nothing short of a miracle. Besides personal reasons, Christian singles and the general idea of singleness from both an economical and social standpoint have been a fascinating focus and one I can honestly say are probably supernaturally driven.
My attendance has become of the grudgingly sort because I’d like to join and have tried for some time, but I’m not connecting. Unfortunately the way the buses run I get there after it’s started, and when it ends my ride isn’t very nice about me wasting any time leaving, lol, so I don’t have time to physically approach anyone. Also, some of the things in recent meetings straight up irked me as well, namely the singles-have-so-much-free-time-and-can-do-what-they-wanna mantra. While I agree that if a friend invited me to lunch I could theoretically just, well, go (sorta), or if I wanted to go on a nature walk for an hour by myself I can just grab my coat, or wanted cheese puffs for a snack I can head out the door, during one of our singles meetings it was said that we have the freedom to move–as in to another city–whenever we want. I’m beginning to notice some married folks say things of this nature, or that I have the freedom to buy a house if I want, or I can dump money into another degree or a business venture at my own whim, ect…
Free time argument aside, since it’s suuuper subjective though it’s obvious those without pressing responsibilities theoretically have more time to spare…I really with the singles-can-do-what-they-wanna mantra would die a slow death.
Because you can’t.
No, you cannot.
Yes. YOU. Reading this post.
One of the main things that stick out to me about the various people in the Bible is the burdens many of them carried for whatever reason. Sometimes I ask for forgiveness for being a mini Jeremiah after getting a bit preachy–I can’t always hold in the fire, lol! But Jeremiah, the first man Adam and many others had jobs as singles, and were subject to God regardless. I in no way think I’m comparable to these mighty men of God, but am likewise subject to Him as a single woman. Even though we may not have family obligations and other issues holding us back, as a single it’s not the greatest idea to buy a one-way ticket to Cancun tomorrow because the wind blew north this afternoon.
Wow…Cancun sounds reaaally nice right about now…*clears throat* Ahem…as I was saying (haha), simply put we need to allow God to order our steps:
As a single, DO ask God what you should do and what directions to go in. If He says no, obey what He says. Remember Noah? Ha!
As a single, practice submitting honorably whether talking to a police officer during a traffic stop or being asked by your boss to do a task that’s genuinely beneath your skills.
As a single, be careful not to let bad habits take foothold because no one’s there to lift an eyebrow.
As a single, SERVE. Service is showing love. I’m not just talking about the Sunday morning ministry kind of service. Serve by giving in for no reason in particular–always getting our way isn’t always the best for character building. Serve by thinking how your talents, abilities and available resources can help those around you. A while ago I wrote a post about the movie The Secret Life of Bees. Even though the movie itself was so-so, what stuck out to me most was the part when the little girl asked one of sisters why their house was an OOGLY (not ugly, oogly…lol) shade of pink. She said it was simply because one of her other sisters liked the color, and sometimes we do things to brings others joy. Now, this doesn’t mean you go painting your house an ugly shade of pink, hahahaa…but keep in mind being right, getting what we want or fulfilling selfish needs will eventually get very old no whether single or married.
At my church we sing a song that goes, “My life is not my own/to You I belong/I give myself/I give myself to You”. If you’re a Christian you’ve been redeemed for a hefty price–Jesus’ sinless life. It may not always be easy, but as an adopted son or daughter in the kingdom, God has a plan for each of our lives. I can only speak for myself, but as much as I’d like to move it’s not in God’s plan for me right now. There are a host of other things I’d like to do, but again, not part of His plan. Even so, I’m eternally grateful for the plans He does have.
If you’re single and reading this, I won’t pretend to know how you feel, or how frustrating it may be to feel unsure about the next stage in your life because you’ve allowed God to be the commander of your ship. Just know that He loves you and just like some earthly dads give their kids wisdom and direction because they want what’s best for you, God is the same!
Be blessed y’all!